Oh my goodness, what a morning.

I think today I really should have stayed at home and locked the doors, though perhaps it would have been interesting no matter where we had gone. Afterall, the morning did start off with me catching Sam placing our last full rolls of toilet paper into the toilet tank. Yes, he had lifted off the tank lid by himself and was watching with interest as the water was absorbed into the rapidly soggy and unusable rolls. Wonderful.

Like a whirlwind I raced through the house and got everyone ready to go out. Even with no much wanted lazing in bed after the alarm and throttle at full, thanks to Sam’s antics, we still managed to arrive at our playdate frazzled and half an hour late.

Jen and Matilda were hosting a playdate for dogs and children at their house so even Quince got to come and have fun today. He was great and had a good time playing with Elbo, Sweet Pea and the cutest little blue eyed husky puppy ever. Today Quince was my star child and of no concern at all. Good boy.

In contrast, my morning was spent charging between my other two children as they both proceeded to give me grey hairs. I kept trying to sit down, have a cup of coffee and talk to the other mums but within a few sips I got called away each time. Amidst the general usual mayhem I’d say that there were three major incidents to deal with though.

The first moment was when I was occupied with something Sam was doing or wanting and distractedly ear wigging on what appeared to be a conversation about how horrified one mum was that some people she knew had no middle names and how awful that was. Bea was contentedly roaming around on the carpet in the middle of a circle of other mums and kids. At least she was, until she suddenly started howling. I recognised my child’s cry in an instant and spun around to see what was wrong. Bea was flat on her back, wailing, kicking and screaming and it seemed like no one around her was paying her any heed. She was red faced and mad. Very, very mad.

I raced over, picked her up, and was appalled to discover that one of the other children had bitten my poor baby right on the forehead. A toddler’s choppers were imprinted on her temple and she has a nasty welt there. My poor darling baby Bea.

With Baby Bea calmed down, the wound wiped with hydrogen peroxide and the offending cannibal given a restraining order we settled back down to enjoy the playdate. It was a little frantic and I really felt like a terrible mum as I was pulled between my two children and constantly seeming to be having one drama or another.

However, the playdate rather blurs into a haze next to significant incident number two.

Matilda’s Dad, Shawn, and his friend dropped by to join us for lunch and when they went to leave Sam and the toddler boys wanted to go out onto the front yard to see the men drive off on their motorbikes. Sam is fascinated by Shawn’s bike. He likes to excitedly tell me that “Matilda’s Daddy goes very fast. Black. Black and shiny. Got monsters. (the bike is a Ducati Monster) Got monsters. He put his helmet on. Matilda’s Daddy put his jacket on. He goes fast. Got monsters. Shiny and black. Matilda’s daddy goes very fast!”

Having waved to the motorbikes the little boys then wanted to stay out on the lush green grass at the front of the house to play with some balls. Bea got to roll around in the turf too and looked precious in her cute onesie with little angel baby graphics on it. Sam and Garrett then disappeared around the side of the house together and when I went after them to make sure they were okay I found the pair of them holding bunches of red berries. I extracted the berries from the vice-like little toddler grips and concernedly questioned the two boys. When Sam told me “little grapes!” alarm bells rang. Worry really set in when Sam then elaborated to say that he had been eating the berries. He said Garrett hadn’t had any, but that Sammy had little grapes in his belly. When I asked him how many he had eaten he counted to five. I had no idea whether to believe him or not, but when he stuck out his tongue and indicated that they didn’t taste too nice I had to think that he really did have experience. Stress!

By this point it was very confusing and other mums were leaving and saying goodbye and generally getting in the way of me finding out whether my son was going to be needing a rapid trip to Casualty. Aargh.

As I was trying to figure out what the plant was called, and how serious this really was, we’re sat on the front steps using Jen’s iPhone to Google amidst the chaos. I’m holding Baby Bea and Sam is wandering up and down the steps.

“Sammy found a snake. Sammy found a black snake Mummy!”

Huh? Right next to me Sam is pointing to the black wrought iron railing going down next to the steps.

“Sammy found a snake. Sammy found a big black snake Mummy!”

Then I see it. Sam is reaching out and touching the tail of a large black snake that was woven through the upright struts and resting on the bottom of the railing. It started to slither off down the steps and onto the pathway where another small child was sat on a tricycle.

We all grabbed the kids and backed off far enough away to feel safe but where we could nervously watch it disappear off into a flower bed and query amongst ourselves as to the imminent danger.

Yikes. Bit too much of a close encounter with the local wildlife for me there. I have since Googled and discovered that it was likely to be a rat snake and therefore not a snake of the really scary variety.

OK, back to the berry problem. I dialled Poison Control and was relieved to be told that Sam shouldn’t have any serious problem if he really had eaten the berries. I was told to give him something to eat and drink, and not to worry unless he starts vomiting copiously. In which case, call them back immediately. I do believe he did have some of those berries though as he has had a rather dodgy tummy since and had to sit on the toilet while complaining that his belly hurts. On the other hand, I suppose that could also be accounted for by the number of slices of watermelon I lost count of that he pilfered and sank his teeth into at the playdate, and all the juice boxes I caught him breaking into when I turned my back. Oh blast that child!

Both kids are taking a nap right now and I am sat here being paranoid and worrying some more about the pair of them.

6 Responses to Oh my goodness, what a morning.

  1. Anonymous May 8, 2009 at 7:08 am #

    Time for a glass of wine and a foot massage I rekon 🙂

  2. ashridge May 8, 2009 at 9:05 am #

    Thank goodness the berries and snake were not poisonous.What a scare though. Hope Baby Bea is recovering from her scare too. Love you lots and hope you have a boring day today love mum xx

  3. Anonymous May 8, 2009 at 7:08 am #

    Time for a glass of wine and a foot massage I rekon 🙂

  4. ashridge May 8, 2009 at 9:05 am #

    Thank goodness the berries and snake were not poisonous.What a scare though. Hope Baby Bea is recovering from her scare too. Love you lots and hope you have a boring day today love mum xx

  5. Anonymous May 8, 2009 at 1:44 pm #

    No middle name

    I’m horrified that some people are horrified that some people do not have a middle name. I have two first names but no middle name and I don’t feel at all deprived. In fact I can say that my life has a been a complete success despite not having a middle name. Any any road up if I did have a middle name I wouldn’t use it anyway.
    regards

    Professor James Julian Haffenbacher Jr III

  6. Anonymous May 8, 2009 at 1:44 pm #

    No middle name

    I’m horrified that some people are horrified that some people do not have a middle name. I have two first names but no middle name and I don’t feel at all deprived. In fact I can say that my life has a been a complete success despite not having a middle name. Any any road up if I did have a middle name I wouldn’t use it anyway.
    regards

    Professor James Julian Haffenbacher Jr III

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